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discipleship, Finding Answers to Stuff Churches Don't Discuss, Uncategorized

How Do I love Thee??

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Last week, we looked at non-negotiable faith practices and contrasted them against subjective ways we worship. I also mentioned the phrase “Christian love.” We say that it is unconditional, but what does that mean? What are the different kinds of love?

“I love my car!”

“I love my friend!”

“I love Jesus!”

Several meanings, one word! Our English language limits how we express feelings and actions, including love. However, the Bible presents three primary loves: lust, fondness, and unconditional love. Let’s examine each.

Lust. Greek epithumia represents a firm intention to have something. Jesus tells us that someone who lusts after (intends to have) another’s spouse has sinned, even if the act falls through (Matthew 5:27-28). Intent (heart/mind) matters!! Our legal system tries people for intending to murder even if the plan was thwarted.

Fondness. Think words that begin with phil. These Greek words represent a fondness for something. For instance, philadelphia is a fondness for brothers and sisters in Christ (Hebrews 13:1). Indeed, you’ve heard of or visited Philadephia, PA, the City of Brotherly Love! Fondness for humankind is philanthropea (Titus 3:3-5), and of money, philaguria (Hebrews 13:5).

Lust and fondness are emotion-driven and, therefore, come and go. You may like me now but hate me tomorrow – especially if my articles conflict with your beliefs. So, neither love is the unconditional love God has shown or that we must have for each other.

Unconditional Love. This love doesn’t come and go with an emotional wind. It’s doing the right thing for the right reason despite feelings. Greek noun agape is this love that God has for all creation. Verb agapao is love action. God is love (agape); God loved and loves as we should (agapo).

For instance, God hasn’t always been happy with humanity but still loves so much that He gave His Son for all people and takes His time before bringing judgment.

We love, because He first loved us (1 John 4:19).

For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life (John 3:16).

The Lord is not slow about His promise, as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing for any to perish but for all to come to repentance (2 Peter 3:9).

… Peter said: “I most certainly understand now that God is not one to show partiality, but in every nation the man who fears Him and does what is right is welcome to Him (Acts 10:34-35).

So, how should we love?

… ‘YOU SHALL LOVE THE LORD YOUR GOD WITH ALL YOUR HEART, AND WITH ALL YOUR SOUL, AND WITH ALL YOUR MIND.’ This is the great and foremost commandment. The second is like it, ‘YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF.’ (Matthew 22:37-39).

Next week, I’ll share the untold Christmas story.

Blessings and peace,

Ron Braley

Finding Answers to Stuff Churches Don't Discuss

True Love . . .

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True love is an actionable one not based on emotion. We usually associate a mushy, warm, down-in-our-gut emotion with love and often mistake that lustful desire or fondness for true love. These feelings are necessary in many human relationships or situations; however, the foundational love we’re to exhibit is related to action. Let’s take a further look at these variations of emotion and actions often called love.

The Bible refers to love in three primary ways: (1) lust or desire; (2) fondness for a person or thing; (3) love not based on emotion but unconditional charitable action that comes from moral compelling. The two types of love based on emotional feeling are lust (or desire) and fondness. Lust is more short-lived than fondness, but both can fade as our feelings change. The latter type of love isn’t based on emotion and is purer and longer-lasting than the first emotion-based loves.

The Holy Scriptures reflect the following three major variations of love in these Greek root words:

  • Epithumeo or epithumia for lust (examples include Matthew 5:27-28; Ephesians 2:1-3)
  • Variations of phil (as in philanthropea or Philadelphia) for fondness (i.e. Mark 10:17-22, Titus 3:3-5, Hebrews 13:1, etc.)
  • Unconditional, non-emotional love – :Agapao (Strong’s Greek G25): a verb representing morally-compelled action we’re to take as in, “Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God.” —1John 4:7. And Agape, a noun representing charitable manifestations that can occur because of compelling agapao love as in, “Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God.” —1John 4:7.

So, being ‘nice’ isn’t what God desires – it is actionable love that honors Him and treats His creation appropriately despite how we feel.

‘Feel’ or ‘do’ – which identifies you?

Finding Answers to Stuff Churches Don't Discuss

Intent Matters!

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Jesus taught that our reason for doing a particular act matters a great deal. For instance, He said there wouldn’t necessarily be a reward, other than perhaps a feeling of personal satisfaction, for being kind to someone just because they’re kind to you (Matthew 5:46). The flip side – showing kindness to those who mistreat you – will yield heavenly reward. On a related note, Jesus also taught as read in Matthew 6:1-18 that doing religious things (e.g. fasting, praying, or giving) for the purpose of being spiritually elevated in the eyes of others’ is equally pointless. So, intent will determine whether an action will be fruitless or rewarded.

Intent – the reason for doing a particular deed – can be as important as the act itself and is a key ingredient to sin! In fact, Jesus reported that the intent to do something can be as bad as the intended action – even if it isn’t carried out. In the following passage, He informs us that if we intend to commit adultery, we’ve done it even if the act wasn’t completed. I know that some people have exclaimed that the passage implies we’ve committed adultery if we privately acknowledge that a woman is ‘hot’ in a fleeting thought, but that wasn’t Jesus’ point.

“You have heard that it was said, ‘YOU SHALL NOT COMMIT ADULTERY’; but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her [desires to have her] has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” —Matthew 5:27-28.  (The comment in brackets was inserted by me and is based on the Strong’s definition of ‘lust’)

Again, Jesus’ point was to teach that once we intend do take sinful action, it’s as good as done.  Understand that a thought in itself isn’t wicked as long as it doesn’t give way to an intention to take action.

How do we ensure a thought doesn’t mature into lustful intent? Internalize God’s ways through study, prayer, meditation, and fellowship so that they become a force greater than physical desire.

Jesus also taught that the heart (mind) gives birth to all kinds of sinful things; this serves as a reminder that rebellion/sin is intentional and begins the mind.

“But the things that proceed out of the mouth come from the heart, and those defile the man. For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, slanders.” —Matthew 15:18-19.

We must always be aware of our intentions and how what we’re going to say or do will affect others. Having a good understanding of God’s ways will help us to know whether something we intend to do or say can result in sinful behavior. That understanding is gained through physical exposure to God’s instructions and spiritual communication through His Spirit.

How do you maintain righteousness and a pure intent?